I notice everyone talks about their lost love, or loves, lately. Just the other day in a drunken mist Mr#4 told me how much he missed his girl. Someone he loved, no, loves and he let her go. She's now engaged, it is now too late, and he's heart broken...well sort of. I wouldn't know...I wasn't sober, but just the shock of him found confident in me to tell me alone is great enough to yank me out of my drunkery...Maybe because we used to date, maybe it was the alcohol talking, who knows.

Everyone comments that everybody has his or her own Hubble or Katie. At some point in your life you will have that love, or dear relationship that you have to let go, because it didn't work, because you caused each other so much pain, because loving one another is not enough to make a relationship work. You think it's true? Cuz I don't....well I do to a certain point then I don't.

It's maybe because I don't have lost love, or maybe because I don't/won't regret anything that I did, do or will in a relationship. Everything that I do in a relationship, every single one of them was for one and one purpose only....to make the person I love happy.

No not happy in the sense that I'd change him, or even worse change myself for him. But in a sense that...I need to make sure the person I love is happy...in the highest, deepest, and the fullest way... even when that means he might not be mine, or at the end I will not be THE person that makes him happy. I'm ok with that, too....If you call making the person you love happy is a "lost" love, I really don't know what that "lost" mean....because to me it's the most fulfill way to love someone

....so there, no regret, no lost love, just love, just bidding each other farewell and wish one another the best.

And to see people once were lovers to hate each other so much, to wish nothing but ill wills....I really don't get it, WHY??? You must not love the other person from the first place then, and I mean it in the kindest way....

Because trust me...when you truly love/loved someone you wouldn't, couldn't in a million years bring yourself to wish anything bad upon them. I only have 3 great relationships...1 guy out 3 is a real asshole and yet for the 7 years we were together...I have never ever curse at him, call him names, or insult him in any other way ..IMAGINE THAT!!! and boy, you people know I love to curse and have no problem throwing  a few Fuck You here and there, I mean I have no problem to fucking kill people when it gets to that point, AND I know exactly where to hit to make it hurts too, I could almost make any person cry if I wanted to...and that's a promise ....And yet, still couldn't bring myself to say a single insulting word in the middle of a fight, even when he had no problem doing that to me... I usually would just leave to save myself from saying/doing anything I would regret later.

If THAT was not true love, I don't know what was.

Heh seriously....otherwise try to insult me, try to call me names and see whether or not I will beat the living shit out of you



I wish you bluebirds in the spring
To give your heart a song to sing
I wish you health
And more than wealth
I wish you love

And in July some lemonade
To cool you in some leafy glade
I wish you health
And more than wealth
I wish you love

My breaking heart and I agree
That you and I could never be
So with my best
My very best
I set you free

I wish you shelter from the storm
A cozy fire to keep you warm
And most of all
When snowflakes fall
I wish you love

And most of all
When snowflakes fall
I wish you love